


I am quitting my job as your boyfriend

by JayJEx



Category: Free!
Genre: But sometimes Rin has it just as bad, Crack, I would not be surprised in the slightest, Idk this is actually kind of plausible, M/M, Poor Rin, Semi-Crack, Sometimes I feel bad for Haru because Rin is such a drama queen, Who reads these tags?, wat is this why does this exist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-09
Updated: 2014-05-23
Packaged: 2018-01-24 02:46:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1588778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayJEx/pseuds/JayJEx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin had been thrown out of the aquarium one too many times for him to not seriously doubt Haru’s ability to control himself around any body of water larger than 1 cubic meter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There were times where Rin seriously regretted dating someone who had an extreme, ridiculous obsession over water.

Of course, it wasn’t entirely bad. Being a swimmer, dating someone who loved being in the water as much as you do is a serious plus( you get a great excuse to throw in some extra training). It made finding a spot for a date really easy (a pool, the beach, a lake, hell, he could probably just pour a bucket of water onto the floor and call it a pond). Presents weren’t that hard to come up with either. Rin had scored some serious points with Haru just by getting him a membership to the sports club with the really big pool.

But sometimes, Haru went and did something so crazy and aggravating that Rin wished he could run screaming headfirst into the nearest ocean, and set it on fire so he wouldn’t have to deal with all of this fucking water.

The plan in itself had been pretty simple. Take Haru to a really pretty park, say some sappy love love things, and have a nice picnic. Then go home and have crazy senseless bed-breaking sex until they dropped.

In hindsight, he should have figured out the complete glaring enormous problem with this plan.

Rin strolled along happily with the food in hand, jumping from rock to rock with relative grace and ease across the river. Haru trailed behind him a little bit slowly, his eyes sparkling with interest and anticipation, which was starting to get Rin a little nervous; Haru was looking at the river, and not at Rin. He’d periodically glance back to make sure Haru was following him, but so far, Haru had made little attempt at stripping naked and jumping into the nearest stream.

He’d looked kind of tempted to once or twice though.

“Oi, Haru!” Rin called out, grabbing Haru by the arm and pulling him along. “Don’t jump in the water.”

Haru pouted, huffing in annoyance, but allowed himself to be dragged away by Rin. He glanced back, looking almost dejected at being removed from the source of water. Still, he offered no resistance. Rin took this as a good sign.

Eventually Rin felt it was safe enough to stop dragging Haru around, although he didn’t release Haru’s hand. He slowed his pace back down to a leisurely stroll, and Haru moved up to be beside him.

“You never actually told me where we’re going,” Haru nudged up against him, his shoulder rubbing up against Rin’s. His eyes searched for Rin’s, but Rin made sure to face forward.

Rin sighed in response. “We’re going somewhere fun, Haru,” Rin continued to walk facing forward, keeping his eyes focused on the path ahead of them. Some of the road had become overgrown, and Rin had to make sure they were going the right way. The last thing he wanted to do with Haru was get lost in the middle of the forest.

Finally, after walking for some time, Rin spotted the entrance to outcropping he’d been looking for. Haru seemed to have spotted it too; his eyes lit up with interest, but Rin knew he had to make sure Haru wouldn’t try anything funny.

He paused and lightly smacked Haru’s forehead. “This is a public park,” he reminded Haru. “If you get caught swimming, they’re going to throw you out.”

Haru snorted. Obviously he found the thought laughable, but Rin wasn’t convinced. He’d been thrown out of the aquarium one too many times for him to not seriously doubt Haru’s ability to control himself around any body of water larger than 1 cubic meter.

Rin slowly began walking forward. The trees above them began to thin, giving way to the bright blue skies above. The grass became thicker at the edge of the trail, and the sunlight began to pierce through the holes in left by the tree leaves. The wind began to flow past them freely, no longer blocked by the dense crowd of trees, and they stepped onto the clearing.

Haru’s eyes lit up almost instantly.

In the center of the clearing, on the foot of a cliff face, sat a dazzling bright blue pond, sparkling brilliantly in the sun. A magnificent waterfall cascaded from the cliff side into the pond, throwing up a column of mist, creating a beautiful rainbow.

Haru dropped Rin’s hand, and started gaping at the waterfall.

Rin smirked, and promptly dropped the basket onto the floor, pulling out a blanket. He began to flatten it out on the floor, spreading it like a tablecloth. Remembering the captivated boy behind him, his expression softened.

“You know Haru,” he said slowly, “I always thought your eyes were more beautiful than any water I’ve ever seen.” He straightened up, letting his head fall back, feeling the breeze run through his hair. “I’ve always thought you were the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

No response.

Rin turned around.

No Haru.

Rin turned to the waterfall.

“Fuck.”

And so, after a long and difficult struggle (Haru was of course extremely fast in the water, and he did not want to leave that pool) Rin finally managed to drag himself and Haru, both sopping wet, onto dry land once more, only to find himself staring straight into the face of a park ranger.

She cleared her throat, her eyes accusing. “Do you boys mind explaining exactly what you were doing in there?”

After an awkward and wet train ride back to Haru’s house on the hill, Rin silently and gloomily resigned himself to sit on floor at the feet of Haru’s table. Haru returned from the kitchen holding two cups, and sat down at the other end of the table, sliding one of the cups over to Rin, who picked up the cup and sipped the tea slowly.

Haru set his teacup down on the table and sighed. “Rin,”

Rin looked up.

“Why did you have to take me out of the water?”

Rin promptly turned the table onto its side and walked out the front door, a long string of obscenities floating out of his mouth.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He pretended not to hear the loud splash as he walked towards the bus stop.

Rin tried. He really, really tried.

He loved Haru. He loved Haru so so much sometimes it made him want to ride a unicorn into the sunset while vomiting magical rainbows of gay-ness. Haru had pulled him out of the self deprecating, angsty mire he'd thrown himself into headfirst. Haru put up with his constant nagging and complaining. Haru gave up swimming for years, all just for him, and Rin appreciated all of that. He really did.

But sometimes, Rin wanted to drown Haru while screaming "HOW MUCH DO YOU LOVE THE WATER NOW, HUH HARU?"

Sometimes Rin would question his imagination.

After the disastrous waterfall picnic, Rin would have been perfectly content to stick his head into a box and never come out, but unfortunately, he and Haru's anniversary was coming up tommorow, which meant Rin had to think of something, and think of something fast.

Luckily, Rin had recently narrowed down his lists of places that it was ok to take Haru. There were basically two options here: a place where Haru can actually get in the water, or a place that featured no water at all.

He set to work immediately, browsing the internet for any semi-fancy cheap seafood restaurant. He managed to find a reasonably priced, fairly well reviewed place online, and ,after verifying that it did not have any fish tanks, promptly called them, making reservations for two. He texted Haru to meet him there, making sure to tell him to wear something reasonable, like a suit or something, and then set about for his preparations for their date.

Despite all the pain that Haru caused him, Rin really wanted to show Haru how much he appreciated him. He knew, even though Haru rarely ever vocalized it, Haru loved him. It was there in the way he swam just a little bit too close to Rin, in the way that he went out of his way to cook meat for Rin, and then had the nerve to look embarrased, in the way that his eyes sparkled a little bit more than usual when Rin would loop their hands together.

Or in the way that he put up with Rin's bullshit for like 6 years when Rin became an angsty, angsty little boy, and then got himself, and all of his teammates disqualified just for the sake of making Rin feel better about himself after his angst ridden emotional breakdown. There was that too.

Rin stopped by a flower shop, and picked up an arrangement of assorted Camellias. When he was younger, he'd researched the meanings of a whole bunch of flowers, and even though he couldn't specifically remember what they meant, he remembered he'd thought they were kinda sweet.

He also remembered that the site he was looking at had "cactus" listed as one of the flowers.

After dressing himself in black slacks, a red dress shirt with a black vest on top, and a bowler cap, Rin headed out to the restaurant with the intention of being early.

Unfortunately the bus decided to take a nice big dump on those plans, and he arrived on the spot with minutes to spare.

After the bus finally plopped him onto the pavement about a block away from the restaurant at about 6:27 pm, the streetlights began to come on in the plaza that he was in, along with a whole bunch of fountain lights that, surprise fucking surprise, illuminated a fucking gigantic, shimmering, marble water fountain right smack dab in the middle of the plaza.

Rin decided that if his life was ever personified, he would hit it with a shovel.

He started panicking, eyes scanning the area rapidly for anything and anyone that resembled his blue eyed boyfriend. He found him almost immediately, stepping off of the next bus which was actually on time.

He kind of stood out though, being the only person in the plaza to be wearing a fucking swim suit of all things.

Rin supposed he had himself to blame. He should have given an example that did not feature the word suit in it.

After pressing his palms onto his forehead and making a noise that sounded somewhere between a sigh, a groan, and a dying animal, Rin decided that he would just have to make the best of things, and started making his way towards Haru. Haru spotted him pretty quickly, and started casually walking in his direction, completely oblivious to the fact that most of the people around him started ogling him.

As soon as Rin was within arms reach of Haru, he smacked him on the forehead.

"I told you to wear something dressy," Rin deadpanned.

Haru's eyes were equally blank. "You said wear a suit. I thought we were going swimming."

Rin decided that he really should be more specific. He closed his eyes and counted to three before even trying to speak. "And where exactly would we be going to swim in this place?" Rin realized his mistake too late.

Haru's eyes began to scan the plaza for any body of water that he could conceivably swim in. His eyes widened, and his mouth dropped open. "Did you get permission to swim in that?" he gestured towards the water fountain.

Rin turned around, walked straight up to the water fountain, and without a word threw his flowers in them.

He pretended not to hear the loud splash as he walked towards the bus stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM CONTRIBUTING TO THE FANDOM :DKFJA;LDKJF ;ALKSDJF; .


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHAHAHAHAHAH AH AH HA HAH ADHF hfa; fhhadf hHA AH AH AHAHhha ah aha hah ah hah ah ha hah ah a *sobs quietly*

Rin admitted that he could get a bit over excited at times. It was one of his very few faults, that he often loosed himself in the moment and promptly defenestrated his logic, and by extension his peace of mind, sanity, and copious amounts of dignity. Keeping a cool head was never something that came easy to him, and there were often so many loud and distracting events that go on around him that it was unfairly easy for him to lose his head.

Generally, Haru was there to act as a buffer. With his aggressively apathetic face and stoic demeanor, Haru was usually quick to let Rin know that he was doing something really stupid. Most of the time by smacking him, and telling him that he's being really stupid. Generally, this method works extremely well. Rin has learned through several horrible and embarrassing experiences that getting carried away in front of Haru leads to a lot of humiliation and shame. And blue balls.

Unfortunately for Rin, Haru is not always perfect. He is, after all, only human, and he has his faults, just the same as Rin does. And Rin understands that, he really does.

The difference between Rin's faults and Haru's faults is that Rin's faults always end up embarrassing Rin, while Haru's faults always end up embarrassing Rin.

Maybe that actually counts as a similarity.

So it worked like this: Rin just finished his second school year in Samezuka. He studied for final after final, day and night, taking breaks to sleep and eat, hell he only swam twice that entire time. He'd turned his phone off in order to minimize distractions, and he hadn't even seen Haru in weeks, and he was fucking exhausted. So when Rin finally unlocked the door to his dorm and flopped onto his bead, the "thank the fuck that's over" feeling hit him fast and hard like a cement truck, and he immediately felt fucking ecstatic. And of course, being all giddy and exhausted and not quite in his right mind and stuff, and being his stupid dumb self, Rin immediately did the stupidest thing possible and started organizing a gigantic "thank the fuck that's over" party, and upon remembering that Iwatobi's semester ended at the same time as Samezuka's, promptly invited every single person in his phone's contact list (except his mother) to his dorm that evening.

At least he was smart enough to tell them to bring their own food.

He spent the entire day getting everything out of the way for the party, a process that mostly involved taking all of Nitori's stuff (including Nitori himself) and throwing it out the front door. Maybe it was a little rude but hey, Nitori could come back in when it was party time. Rin took his hard earned alone time to get himself ready; he had to make sure he looked good because it was the first time he and Haru had seen each other in weeks, and of course Rin wanted it to be a good time. He took his time taking a nice, long, hot shower, and leisurely picked out the perfect outfit, trying on hat after hat, checking the mirror from as many angles as he could, making sure to periodically respond to Nitori's distressed screams of "SENPAI LET ME IN IT'S COLD OUT HERE" with a polite, concise "You can come back in when the party starts in 3 hours".

Eventually Rin decided to take pity on Nitori, and allowed Nitori to come back in. On the condition that he go out and buy several six-packs of beer.

Rin supposed Nitori had his uses.

In any case, after hours and hours of hard labor, with the beer sitting pretty in the cooler on the floor, and Rin agreeing to help Nitori put his stuff back in the closet of their dorm, Rin declared himself ready for the party. Almost immediately after that, the trickle of guests began with Seijuro, and several other members of the Samezuka swim team, who came inside and immediately grabbed beers to start on the strenuous, arduous task of getting themselves completely and utterly hammered before the night was over.

Following not to long after them was Rei and Nagisa, sheltering Gou in between the two of them. They already looked winded from laughing, Nagisa and Gou being red in the face flushed, and they all looked as belated as he felt about their school year ending.

His dorm was starting to feel a little bit full, but Rin didn't really mind at the moment. Everyone was laughing and happy, and Rin enjoyed the positive atmosphere. It lifted the dregs of stress from his shoulders, and he found himself joining in the laughter at the sight of Nagisa triumphantly holding a certain pair of red glasses over his head while sitting on top of Rei, who was hunched over onto his hands and knees.

Of course the front door opening heralded a new arrival, and while Rin could only just barely see the top of Makoto's head over the crowd, he knew that a certain raven haired straight faced boy had to be with him. He grinned and grabbed another can of beer.

Rin w, his normally deadpan gaze scanning desperately for something. Haru's gaze found him almost immediately upon entering his line of sight, and without another word, he started walking straight towards Rin.

Rin held out the can for Haru, who accepted it quickly. With everyone here, Rin decided it was only proper to make a toast, and he immediately started getting the attention of everyone in the room.

After the noise died down and all eyes were fixated on Rin, Rin held his can up over his head.

"The first thing I would like to say-" Rin stopped upon hearing the loud gulp and subsequent sigh come from beside him.

He turned around.

Haru's normally apathetic look was replaced with a slightly more dazed expression, and his cheeks slightly flushed red. He looked in confusion at the can in his hand before dropping it onto the floor.

Rin realized with a start that it was empty.

Haru hiccuped.

"Tha','" *hic* "wasn't wa'er" Haru's speech was already slurred.

The room was still silent. Rin remembered that everyone was still currently staring at them both.

Rin silently grabbed the can off of the floor,opened the window beside him, and defenestrated his can, Haru's can, and a large part of his peace of mind, sanity, and dignity.

Haru promptly smacked him on the side of his head and told him to stop being an idiot.

**Author's Note:**

> I can't write why are you reading this D:. Don't look at me D:.


End file.
